Las Vegas Day Drinking

There is this strange pull in America between breaking the rules and being drones.  I mean the Pilgrims broke all the rules running away to America so they could be more strict in their religious practices. Now normally this type of tension only really annoys me when I have to take my flip flops off at the airport (I’m just waiting for the class action suit for when people start getting foot herpes or whatever nastiness you just know is all over those foot pads) and I get over it, understanding the TSA for the grand job creation scheme that it is. 

BUT when this bullshit gets in the way of my enjoying a quality cocktail, well, that I cannot stomach.  Take for example my situation yesterday.  Being the cultured DayDrinker that I am, I had gone to take in the artistic offerings of the Imperial Palace casino: Human Nature (the four white Australians who sing Motown hits), Diva Las Vegas (Frank Moreno and his merry drag queens) and of course, the Rockhouse Guitar (80oz of frozen alcoholic slush in a plastic guitar shaped drinking vessel).

The day started okay enough with a solid Mai-tai during the show, but then, in the break, I thought we’d take advantage of the free entry and drink at Rockhouse.  The bouncer was delightful, the music sing-a-long-able, and the bartendress a fucking bitch on wheels.  Visibly holding my drink coupons, I ordered a vodka redbull (the night was young) and a Jack and coke (what else?) she took my order, came back, hands full of glorious alcohol and said “Oh, you can’t get redbull with that.” then she paused and added “Or Jack.  You can’t get Jack with that either.”  “Ok, what can I get?” “anything just not name” “Ok, so I can get I get a whisky and RC Cola and a vodka cranberry?” Now up until this point, annoying yes, but infuriating, well, after you’ve been in Vegas more than a week, no. 

BUT THEN, THE BITCH DUMPS THE TWO PREMIUM DRINKS IN THE TRASH!!! 

WTF?!!?!?! 

She tosses the drinks and pours new, bottom shelf drinks, hands them to me and leaves for greener pastures. 

Look, I get it, the coupons are only for certain drinks (not that they specified that on them, but whatever), and I get it, you should tell me that before I order, but if we both somehow manage to get to the point where you have poured the drink, you would rather dump it in the trash than give it to me?!?!  In what fucked up universe does that make sense?  How does that help your bottom line or your reputation?  Are you just following orders?  Did you ever stop to wonder if these orders made any sort of sense? 

ARGHHHHHHHHH 

I hope she gets that hideous toenail fungus I hear is going around at the Vegas airport.  And that she doesn’t hear about the class action either. 

For the record, I still tipped her.  I probably shouldn’t have- how is she ever going to learn if I continue rewarding this sort of behavior? 

But, putting aside the bitterness of the beverage, I must say that the Divas Las Vegas fucking rocked it!  If you want a really fun night out, go see them.